Tips on Taking Care of Yourself During Divorce

One memorable diary entry in the novel Bridget Jones’s Diary records a day when Bridget was still reeling from a breakup. It begins with an itemized list of all the junk food Bridget ate that day, plus how many cigarettes she smoked and how many units of alcohol she consumed. She then writes that she had one positive thought and appends a note that says, “Very good.” Although Bridget in the novel is a single woman who has never been married, her diary entry is equally applicable to the mindset of someone in the midst of a divorce. Besides the heartbreak, you now have to manage all the responsibilities of parenting and financially supporting your household, except now without your spouse’s presence or contributions. It can be truly overwhelming, and the well-meaning advice that you should stick to a healthy diet and think positive thoughts rings hollow. If you have gotten through a day without saying anything negative about your spouse in the presence of your children, you should make a mental note that says “very good” because things will get better, and you are now one day closer to better times. A Chicago divorce lawyer can help you establish a strong foundation for your new life as a single mom.

Embrace Life’s Imperfections

Self-acceptance is one of the most valuable gifts that you can give your children, and the only way to give it to them is to model it in your own behavior. If your bank account balances are plummeting, your weight is creeping up, and it has been days since you found the time to bathe, express this as gratitude that you and your children are together. Charge some dollar menu items on your credit card, watch some old movies on YouTube, even though you have to wait a few seconds to skip the ads (if your kids complain, tell them about the long commercial breaks your generation had to sit through), and give yourself a “very good” for the day. Try again tomorrow to accomplish what you can.

Let Your Family and Friends Help You Through the Hardest Times

The bonds of friendship and extended family make the pain of divorce more bearable. Your family and friends can make this year easier on you and your children, and not just by creating new holiday memories for the first year that your kids didn’t spend Christmas with both parents. If you are having a bad day, call a friend when your kids are at school and talk about your situation. If you are too tired and stressed to leave the house, ask your brother’s wife if you can drop your children off with her this afternoon, so you can take a nap or declutter part of your house. Ask the parents of your child’s teammate if they can give your child a ride home from soccer practice this week.

Let Your Lawyer Do the Legal Heavy Lifting

Rely on your lawyer’s professional expertise to help you with the most difficult communications during a divorce. Instead of confronting your spouse about how his financial disclosures are incomplete or inaccurate or about how he needs to hurry up and submit them, have your lawyer email your spouse’s lawyer.

Contact Women’s Divorce and Family Law Group About Getting Through Your Divorce

A Chicago family law attorney can help with the legal aspects of divorce, so you can focus on survival. Contact Women’s Divorce & Family Law Group in Chicago, Illinois, to discuss your case.