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April 14, 2015

Important Steps to Keep Your Divorce Civil and Cost-Effective

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Important Steps to Keep Your Divorce Civil and Cost-Effective

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The word divorce typically carries with it certain ideas and feelings, most of which are negative. While divorce itself does signal that a marriage is ending, which is usually considered negative, the actual divorce process does not have to be ugly and combative. Of course, many divorces do turn nasty because one or both parties find it too difficult to let go of all the hurt feelings. Instead of trying to move forward, they focus on the past, which only prevents wounds from healing.

Divorce Does Not Have to Be Ugly

However, just because divorce carries a negative connotation it doesn’t have to. The process and the outcome of your divorce will be determined largely by how you choose to act. You can take the right steps to make your divorce civil, which in turn can help speed up the process and lead to a less costly divorce process. On the other hand, if you choose to go the negative and nasty route, chances are your divorce will take longer to finalize, cost you more money, and leave you more stressed out and angry when it’s done, than if you had chosen the civil route.

Try These Steps

So what are some things you can do to avoid turning your divorce into an ugly mess? Let’s look at some effective ideas:

  • Keep Negative Thoughts Quiet – the old adage “if you can’t say something nice, then don’t say anything at all” is so true when it comes to divorce. It is totally natural to have bad feelings towards your estranged spouse, but it’s best if you keep those thoughts to yourself.
  • Don’t Forget to Vent – of course, you can’t keep that anger pent up too long and it is important to share your feelings instead of suppressing them. However, you need to do it away from your spouse. Find a place to let it all out, or a friend or family member who can listen. For some people, even writing all of their thoughts and feelings down can be good therapy.
  • Keep the Kids Out of it – Along those same lines, don’t ever speak negatively about your spouse in front of your children. This will only add to their stress. They are already dealing with many emotions and they don’t want to feel like they have to choose between their parents.
  • Focus on the Future – Remember that looking back and rehashing the old wounds only opens them up again. Instead focus on the task at hand and keep an eye toward the future. Get your current issues resolved and start working on your new life as a single person.
  • A Good Attorney – by hiring an experienced attorney you can also help calm the waters. Often it’s best to use your attorney to communicate with your spouse if you have a difficult time communicating with each other.

Divorce Can Be Civil

There is no rule that says divorce has to be ugly. While many aspects of divorce can be difficult, the fact is you can make your divorce process go much smoother if you make the rights choices. The experienced divorce attorneys at the Women’s Divorce & Family Law Group in Chicago can also help you wade through the troubled waters of divorce. Just call us today at 312-445-8830 for help with your divorce. You can also reach us online by clicking here.

This is not intended to be legal advice and this should only be considered general information. You should always contact an attorney to decide what is best for you in your particular case and circumstances.

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