Reviewed by Joshua P. Haid, Managing Partner

Mental Health & Divorce

Divorce is one of the most stressful experiences a person can go through, and it would be strange not to feel its weight. Grief, anxiety, anger, relief, exhaustion — often all in the same week — are a normal response to an enormous life change, not a sign that anything is wrong with you. Taking care of your mental health through this is not a luxury; it is part of getting through it, for you and for your children.

We are family lawyers, not therapists, but we walk beside women through this experience every day, and we know how much the emotional side matters. This page is a place to acknowledge it honestly, and to answer a question that quietly worries many mothers: whether getting help for yourself could ever be held against you.

You don’t have to carry the legal weight and the emotional weight alone. Let us handle the legal side. Talk with a Chicago divorce lawyer who represents women — free, confidential, 312-445-8830.

Taking care of yourself

There is no medal for going through divorce without support, and no shame in leaning on people. Simple things help more than they seem they should: staying connected to friends and family, keeping some routine, moving your body, and giving yourself permission to feel what you feel. Many women also find real relief in talking to a professional — a therapist or counselor who can help them process the change. If your feelings ever become overwhelming, or you find yourself unable to cope, please reach out to a mental health professional or your doctor; getting support is a sign of strength, and you deserve it.

Will getting help for my mental health hurt me in a custody case?

This is one of the most common quiet fears we hear, and it stops some women from getting help they need — so let us be clear. Seeking therapy or counseling during a divorce is not, by itself, a mark against you in a custody case. If anything, taking responsible care of your wellbeing reflects well on you as a parent. Illinois custody decisions are based on the best interests of the child, and courts distinguish between a parent who responsibly seeks support and one whose untreated struggles genuinely affect their ability to care for a child. Getting help is the responsible choice, not a risky one. If you are ever worried about how a mental health issue could intersect with your case, tell us — that is exactly the kind of thing we help you navigate, honestly and without judgment.

Protecting your children’s wellbeing

Your children are watching how this unfolds, and the good news is that what helps them most is largely within reach: shielding them from conflict between their parents, keeping their routines as steady as possible, reassuring them that both parents love them and that none of this is their fault, and letting them feel their own feelings. Children are resilient, especially when the adults around them handle the transition with care. If a child is struggling, a counselor who works with children of divorce can help. Part of our job on the legal side is to reduce conflict where we can, because a lower-conflict divorce is easier on everyone, most of all the kids.

How we help carry the weight

You have a great deal to manage right now, and the legal process should not be one more thing that keeps you up at night. That part is ours to carry. We handle the filings, the deadlines, the negotiation, and the strategy, and we keep you informed without overwhelming you. We work to keep your divorce as low-conflict as your situation allows, because that protects your peace and your children’s. And we are a steady, knowledgeable presence in your corner, so that whatever you are feeling, you never have to face the legal side of this alone.

Related: New to Divorce · Child Custody · Mediation & Collaborative Divorce · Chicago Divorce

Let us carry the legal weight so you can focus on you and your children. Reach out — free, confidential consultation.

If you are in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, please call or text 988 (the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline) or go to your nearest emergency room. You are not alone, and help is available.